for ididntrun

[spikedbats]

[ The first time it happened, Steve chalked it up to a fluke. What else could it have been? Clearly he had dreamt of their attempted attack on Vecna, and when he woke up to Dustin kicking him awake, that they would get it right that time and they would move on, with that initial failure being nothing but a bad nightmare, a fluke of the imagination.

Only it wasn't just one time. The chimes went off again, with the reminder of what they meant for Max. And then Eddie's blood would stain his hands, and he would rush to the nearest bathroom to scrub them off, suddenly incapable of drawing in breaths. And then he would fall asleep next to Robin, and wake up with Dustin kicking him awake once more.

It wasn't until the fourth time that he realized if he kept doing the same thing, that he would never get out of this hell.

He tried little things at first. Switching the order of things before they make it to the War Zone. Letting Eddie drive. Staying in the bus with Eddie while everyone else stocks up on supplies.

But still, Eddie sacrifices himself, and Lucas can never get to Max in time to save her.

It had to have been fifteen times when Steve started to question why. Why him? Why was he the only one who knew they were reliving the same events over and over, desperate to get it right? ]

I don't know if I can watch him die anymore... [ Words that he had uttered to Robin one loop, even if she promptly forgot them the next time he woke up. But at least she held onto those words long enough to ask him, why do you think it hurts so much?

The next loop he kissed Eddie for the first time, only for Eddie to sacrifice himself again. When Steve woke up and Eddie didn't remember any of it, Steve sprinted outside to let out the most guttural yell he could muster.

And all of that culminating to this. His master plan. He had figured out the basics: he needed to warn Erica about the hick that walked his dog by the Creel house; no matter what happened, something would always trigger the vines in the Creel house, but at the same time every loop something caused them to let go; if Eddie and Dustin were the distraction, he would buy Steve more time, every single time.

So, Steve convinces them again. That he's gone through this before, citing all the things he's learned each loop. How Lucas got Max a first edition Wonder Woman comic at a yard sale. Nancy wanted to intern for the Boston Globe. Dustin has a lucky d20 that frequently rolls a 19, and it's blue with white numbers. Eddie claims he doesn't care where he moves to so long as it's not in Indiana and he can drive back to Hawkins to visit Wayne within a day. Eddie learned Master of Puppets in a week after it came out, recording it onto a blank cassette so he could play it over and over, learning each chord. If Corroded Coffin doesn't pan out, he wants to work for a recording studio, even it's just to shadow someone, just to get access to that studio. Eddie wants, Eddie, Eddie, Eddie.

It works, and they're convinced. Steve takes Nancy and Eddie with him to the Creel house in the Upside Down and warns Erica to stay out of sight until the dog walker is gone. Robin and Dustin are to rig one of Eddie's speakers to play on top of the trailer in the Upside Down and reinforce every single fucking possible vent so that they don't have to worry about any bats getting through.

And yet, Steve doesn't feel convinced that this is going to work. But he knows, if it doesn't, he's out of ideas. It has to work. And if it doesn't? ]

Munson, you okay? [ Nancy has given them some breathing room on their long march to the Creel house. He suspects she knows despite Steve not having to say anything. Something about the way Steve looks at Eddie must be extremely obvious. Perhaps because it's the way Steve used to look at Nancy, when he was in love with her. ] We're almost there. We can do this. [ That might be more for his sake than for Eddie's. ]

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[spikedbats]

[ Maybe it's the fact that Steve is so hyperfocused on avoiding stepping on the vines. Or maybe it's the fact that he recognizes that the point in which Robin usually triggers the vines hasn't happened and they have managed to get further into the house. Maybe it's the sudden realization that they're so close that keeps Steve from feeling the sleight of hand as Eddie slips his rings into his pocket.

But all matter of hope drains out of him when he realizes that something isn't right. Vecna should have taken the bait by now, but something is telling Steve that he's moved on from Max, that she escaped too quickly.

Or he let her go.

Almost as if he is after something else. ]

Stay close to me. [ He doesn't look over his shoulder to make sure Eddie is following, but he suddenly find that he can't move forward because there's a hand on his shoulder, forcing him in place. A hand that feels much too strong to be Eddie's. ]

Hey, man, cut it out. We're almost there. [ He keeps his voice quiet, suddenly fearing that Vecna will overhear them, will recognize the trap they're trying to set.

Steven, did you really think you could get this far without my noticing?

Steve's blood goes cold, his breath coming in shallow gasps as he turns his head just enough so that he can see out of the corner of his eye it isn't Eddie who is with him, but a grotesque figure wearing a tattered version of his clothes. Vecna.

While Steve is busy battling demons in his head, the only indication that something would be wrong would be Steve frozen in place, his eyes glazed over, ghastly white. ]

[ididntrun]

[ Eddie lets out an unsteady breath and moves after Steve, wishing he could telegraph what he needs to into the back of his head, right until the point that Steve steps through the door and stops suddenly and Eddie nearly knocks him over by walking into him.

Nancy turns from the sight of Vecna strung up in his spider's web, face furious at the sound of the scuffle, but it shifts into something fearful in an instant and Eddie knows what's happening before she even gets Steve's name out of her mouth. Eddie shifts stepping around Steve and grabbing him by the shoulders, seeing the same white film that he'd seen first in Chrissy's eyes. ] Fuck, no! Steve, don't do this to me. Come on. Come on!

[ Nancy raises her shotgun and fires, determined to end this here and now. Her expression is hard as she is shouting at Eddie to follow the plan. That it's the only way to save him. But Steve's feet are lifting from the floor and Eddie can't breathe. He knows what comes next. Chrissy's death replays in his head, the breaking of bones. The squelching of eyeballs as they were sucked into the back of her head. ] Goddamn it! Steve, listen to me. You've got to hear me. You've got to wake up. Steve! Steve!

[ Nancy's aiming her second shot, only feet away from Vecna when the vines reach for her and slam her against the attic wall. The shotgun falling out of her hands. Black vines wrap around Eddie's wrists, throat and chest and pull him away from Steve to the floor. He hears the glass bottles in pack on his back break, smells gasoline as it soaks through the fabric and watches with rising terror as Steve continues to rise in front of him. ]

[spikedbats]

[ Steve is kicking himself right now, because of course he didn't account for this, that eventually Vecna would realize that Steve has been messing with time somehow. But there was simply no way he could have predicted that he wouldn't have been too preoccupied with Max to then chase after Steve instead.

While Steve is frozen in place, starting to levitate in reality, the Steve in his mind is running for the door to the Creel House, finding it locked, with Vecna's horrible voice calling to him. Vecna mocks him, throws everything he can at him: his parents, Tommy Hagan, Billy Hargrove, even Nancy and Barb. When he does finally find a door he can use to get out of here, he's thrown right into his own house, though it looks more decrepit and run down, like it's decayed in the time Steve has been in the Upside Down.

His parents taunt him, point out all his weaknesses and his insecurities, and Steve almost gives up, because he knows he's not strong. He's supposed to protect the others, but he couldn't even do that, couldn't protect Eddie all this time, and --

Eddie. He has to keep fighting. He can't leave him, not now, not when they're finally starting to figure all of this out.

So he stops and he thinks, conjuring up every happy memory he can. His first kiss with Nancy; walking down the train tracks with Dustin, setting out bait for Dart; meeting Max for the first time; driving Dustin to the Snow Ball; bathroom confessionals with Robin; his first time meeting Eddie, his first time kissing Eddie, his first time --

When he opens his eyes he's in a different memory. He's in Eddie's trailer, and Vecna is nowhere to be found. Cautiously, he approaches Eddie's bed, sits down on it, and looks around to take in his surroundings. It looks even nicer than he remembers it. Before Chrissy died on the ceiling. He and Eddie had snuck in here one loop under the pretense of changing Steve's bandages, and had wound up fooling around. That brings a smile to Steve's face, and he brings his fingers up to his lips as he can practically feel Eddie's lips as if they had just kissed moments ago. ]

You're not Max.

[ El's voice startles him, and Steve's head jerks to the side when he spots her in the doorway. He relaxes when he realizes that she's not Vecna. ]

Sorry to disappoint. Guess he didn't want her after all.